11/12 - When Hypnotherapy Actually Made Everything Worse

So the plan was in place.

Over the following weeks and months, with perhaps two or three weeks between each appointment, I would begin hypnotherapy sessions, addressing each of the five key areas individually.

Andrew explained how the process would work and prepared me for the first full session a few weeks later.

When that day arrived, I sat down with him. Phones were turned off. Distractions removed.

He asked me:

“Which of those five areas would you like to experience healing from first — where would you like to experience inner healing with your inner child?”

My immediate response was inner peace.

I said to Andrew, “If I can experience true, continuous inner peace, I believe that will positively affect the other areas I’ve struggled with for so many years.”

The session began.

During that first deep hypnotherapy session, my younger self - my “inner child” - surfaced the moment when my inner peace was first broken. The moment I had formed the belief that I did not deserve to live with true inner peace.

It was emotional.

When the session concluded and I was brought out of the hypnotic state, I opened my eyes and asked:

“Was I actually hypnotised then? I can remember everything.”

Andrew responded by asking how my feet felt. As I moved my toes, they were heavy, with pins and needles. The same with my hands and arms.

“Paul,” he said, “you were deeply hypnotised. What you brought up was powerful.”

He told me I no longer needed to think about those things. I could move on. I would begin to notice the destructive thought patterns are no longer there.

I believed him.
I trusted him.
I felt I had experienced a breakthrough.

We arranged the next session.

Over the following months, through to early 2019, I attended each hypnotherapy session. They were deep. Emotional. Intense.

I believed I was being healed.

By the end of February 2019, the final session concluded. Andrew described the process as a success.

I had finished hypnotherapy.
I was healed.

I could now move forward with my life - free from the dark, destructive voice that had followed me for over two decades.

I paid the £100, shook his hand, thanked him sincerely, and drove home.

On the way home, I was already preparing to tell my wife:

“I am healed. I am free. We can move forward.”

When I told her, she believed me. She trusted me.

I believe she felt immense relief.

One week later, the voice returned.

Without warning.

The same whisper I had heard for over twenty years.

I was mortified.
Horrified.

The thing I believed had been permanently removed was back - and stronger.

My entire being dropped back into heaviness. Into despair. Into helplessness.

My wife knew immediately. She saw it in my eyes. In my posture.

We were both exhausted.

After five years of therapy.
After significant financial investment.
After sincere effort.

I was still trapped.

Over the following weeks leading up to the end of March 2019, the darkness intensified. The frequency of the voice increased.

My mind spiralled.

On 31st March 2019, my wife reached her limit.

She told me she had hit a brick wall.
She felt helpless.
Hopeless.

She could not continue living inside the emotional volatility of the previous years.

She could not continue carrying the weight.

My marriage collapsed.

In the same season, my business collapsed.

The professional identity I had spent 20 years building began to fracture.

I was helpless.
I was hopeless.
I hit rock bottom.

Not because I had not tried.

But because everything I had tried over all the years had failed to reach the root.