6/12 - “THIS IS ME!!!” – When I Read A Story That Gave Me Hope

I was 35.

The business was growing rapidly. Income had increased to a level that allowed my wife and I to move from our modest family home into a much larger property in the Cheshire countryside — an acre of land, space, presence, what many would describe as “arrival.”

Outwardly, life was becoming picture-perfect.

Inwardly, it was not.

Within months of moving, my marriage began coming under increasing strain. The pressure had not started there - it had been building quietly for years behind closed doors.

From the age of 18, I had battled destructive thought patterns. At times, very dark thoughts. Seventeen years later, those unresolved internal fractures were now bleeding into my marriage.

My wife would become deeply emotional during certain episodes of my behaviour. Not constantly. But enough. She could not understand me.

The harder truth?

I did not understand myself.

Something had to change.

For the first time, I recognised I needed professional help.

I picked up my phone and Googled:

“psychologists in Cheshire”

One of the first results was a small psychology practice. I clicked onto the site. It was simple. No grand branding. Just a short introduction to a psychologist named Mike.

Then I read the testimonials.

There were three or four. One in particular stopped me.

It described a man struggling deeply with his mind and mental health. His work was affected. His relationship was affected. His experience of life was affected.

He began 1-1 sessions.

Over time, he felt freer. Clearer. Lighter. His life was no longer what it had been.

I remember the exact internal moment.

As I read it, I thought:

“THIS IS ME!! This is me. He’s describing my life.”

It was the first time I had seen my inner world articulated by someone else.

And more than that -

It suggested change was possible.

I immediately sent an enquiry.

The following week, I was sitting in Mike’s therapy room, surrounded by shelves of books on psychology and the human mind. He made me a cup of tea. From my initial enquiry and our brief phone call, Mike simply knew I was having challenges in my marriage due to my feelings and emotions.

His first question was:

“Paul, tell me about your childhood and your family growing up.”

I remember thinking:

Why are we talking about childhood?
Why not my marriage?
Why not what’s happening now?

I did not yet understand that present behaviour is often rooted in earlier formation.

But that question marked the beginning of something important.

For the first time, my inner world was being brought into the open.

Why I Am Sharing This

There is a reason this story matters in this 12-part series.

Years earlier, I experienced something powerful:

Recognition.

I saw myself in another man’s story - and it gave me hope.

If even one leader reads any part of this series and thinks:

“That’s me.”

Then the sharing is worth it.

Not for attention.
Not for sympathy.

But for connection.

Recognition can be the first crack of light.